Episode 44: Urban Trauma, Schizophrenia, and Self Care with Dr. Ashley Elliott PhD aka DrVivid

44 a Doctors Perspective Podcast ashley elliott drvivid phd

Dr. Ashley Elliott, PhD talks to Dr Trosclair on A Doctors Perspective Podcast.

Dr. Ashley Elliott PhD talks her age 4 job path, self-care necessities, schizophrenia, her specialty urban trauma and adolescents, community activism, motivational speaking, sports psychology, tele medicine and why she doesn’t tell you what to do.

Human Connection, Urban Trauma, humanistic existentialist (I see you as a human and unconditional positive regard and the bad behavior you do does not make you inherently bad or good.) She is in-tune to what the client needs to be able to open up and make break throughs; whether that’s painting, laying on the floor, taking a walk… boils down to making the client comfortable.

Her passion for psychology and helping others stemmed for her own experience at a young age with not one but two unethical counselors.

Her mom was very keen to get her the care necessary and break the cycles. Dr. Ashley Elliott was appreciative, grateful and sparked a desire to help those in need.

Dr. Ashley completed undergrad at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond VA, and masters and doctorate at American School of Professional Psychology. She is a home grown and still lives in Washington D.C..

She specializes in Schizophrenia, Chronic Depression and also what she calls Urban Trauma (Chronic cycles of violence, poverty and overlooked poverty stricken neighborhood issues). Also she has a passion for adolescent because they are hilarious and moldable.

What is the stigma and challenges with counseling schizophrenia so they don’t just end up in jail or worse. Pills are good but they don’t help the underlying problem. She outlines a few different styles of schizophrenia and how important support is for these people.

Teenagers like boundaries and structure despite what they would think. They will act out and a good counselor can help them understand consequences and how to handle the emotions they experience. Are parents the best option to be their safe space or is it someone else?

Educational advocate at a lawyer firm and professional opinion on cases. She also has her own company Vivid Innovation Consulting LLC “DrVivid” which focuses on community activism, social skill groups, motivational speaking, mental health consultant for training summer programs. Her heart and passion is so big that she is flexible with her fees so that more lives are impacted.

What’s the difference between psychologists vs psychiatrists?

Why don’t psychologists tell you what to do in the situation that you are obviously asking their advice on?

She dives into not burning out and what is needed for a positive experience with a psychologist based on her own uniqueness.

Self care and finding out who you are is incredibly important in picking a profession and stopping the burn out in work and family
life. She discusses ways to deal with stress including sleep, naps, wine and showers. You have to know yourself outside of relationship and your job. Learn how to communicate your needs. Power of daily positive affirmations and instilling that in your kids too.

Is Tele-Conferencing and Skype based sessions catching on and what are the pitfalls and pluses of cyber connections?

Dr. Elliott also talks at the end of the interview about sports psychology and who you are outside of sports.

Dr. Ashley Elliott has two programs: Innovator Academy (13-17 year olds) and Vivid Kids (3-12 years old). She covers Identity issues, emotional wellness, interpersonal communication and more.

Ruby Scoops IceCream Peach Cobbler and Bailey’s Irish Flavor … in the DC area you have to get some.

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius .

www.vividinnovators.com is her site and www.instagram.com/drvivid she is on all the social media.

Show notes can be found at www.adoctorsperspective.net/44 here you can also find the transcript of the interview, links to things mentioned and the Travel Tip.

This episode is a part of the African American Doctor Spotlight Series. Put your email for a Quick Reference PDF to save for future viewing.

Travel Tip:

Travel Tip
Mobile apps for travel sometimes give special mobile app booking discounts.
Full Transcript of the Interview (probably has some grammatical errors). Just Click to expand
Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Episode 44 urban trauma, schizophrenia and self care. I’m your host, Dr. Justin Foursquare today. We are Dr. Elliot PG perspective.

Join 2017 podcast Awards Nominated host Dr. Justin Foursquare as he gets a rare to see him look into the specialties, all types of doctors and guess plus marketing, travel tips, struggles, goals, and relationship advice. Let’s hear a doctor’s perspective.

I couldn’t be more thrilled I’m starting to series this week, it might be a mini series, or might be a nice long series. It just depends on how many guests I can get lined up in a row. Right now we got psychologist, we got doctors of chiropractic and medical doctors, and more. We’re doing a spotlight on African American doctors, men and women. So stay tuned for the next couple of weeks, you’re going to find out all about what they do, what their specialty is maybe some unique struggles. So unique cultural experiences, on top of some amazing knowledge that we can listen, learn and implement to make our practices and our life better. The African American doctor holiday season series on a doctor’s perspective, let’s do this.

Welcome back to the show. I think you are all going to enjoy today because we’re going to go into what self care is why it’s important. We’re going to talk a little bit about schizophrenia and some of the troubles with the system that we have and her specialty urban trauma, cycles of violence and poverty. She’s gonna go over her community activism, motivational speaking her thoughts on telemedicine, and even more, she’s really passionate. We’ll start the interview with personal story of hers. So all the show notes can be found at a doctor’s perspective. NET slash for for let’s go hashtag behind the curtain.

Live from China. We have a fantastic guest today, Doctor of psychology all the way from Washington, DC, Dr. Alex. Elliot, thanks for being on the show.

Unknown 2:01
Thank you for having me. I feel like I’m transported internationally. I feel nice. Oh,

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
it’s going to be nice. Well, I was on your Instagram, and you had these great little 32nd videos that are normally only see chop, because that doesn’t sound right. But they’re cut. It’s like they’re really edited together nicely. Yes. Well, thank you. And they’re just really good, like motivational. You had one that was pretty cool. It was the word pray. And you had used to two different ways. It’s like, Oh, that’s clever. She’s putting some thought behind her Instagram. So I thought that was really cool. say, Okay, let me get her on the show. So

Unknown 2:38
tell me how of all the things out there in the world? How did you pick psychology and then to go all the way to the doctor level? Wow. Well, first, thank you for all those nice things you say. Because those videos, I didn’t know that they would be affecting people the way that they are. So that’s always a plus. To be honest, I got into pursuing psychology because when I was younger, I was about four years old. And I went to a clinical psychologist for some help. I had experienced some trauma, and had encountered chronic interactions with trauma. And my mom being a good mom, she was okay, we’re gonna put her in therapy. How ever I will say one thing one brag about myself. I’ve always been book smart and promotions. So this clinician decided that he was going to make me fabricate stories about my trauma. So basically, he was trying to get me get me to say whatever he thought, we’ll get him more hours bill, and he will try to give me candy. And we’re going to do the whole session is going to be a play session. So at four, I realize I would just lie and make up stories. But I would do it in a way that I was kind of hinting to my mother, this is what he’s going to tell you. So long story short, he got caught in a lie. And after being in the for six months with him, and then six months with another therapists who was just evil. She didn’t like kids. I don’t know why she even was a child psychologist. She hated kids. I looked at my mom. And I said, I think I told her that I was scared that other kids will go to them. And they will feel sad too. So I just started it. I wanted to find a way for other children, other adults, you know, to have their voices being heard without somebody trying to twist their narrative for gain. Or just to say, Hey, I did my job today.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Wow, that is horrible. Professionally, I mean, that’s like scars that will go deep. And you’re obviously still remember all of this stuff at such a young age.

Unknown 4:43
Yes, that was it was it was the dreaded day. I had therapy every Thursday. And I would always remember what do I have to say so I can get out with his candy today.

Unknown 4:58
But But I and since then,

Unknown 5:02
at seven I started decided that your mom, this is what I wanted to do. At first I thought I wanted to be an artist. And she said, Well, artists don’t get paid until after they die. And I was like, well can’t do that. And then so maybe I want to be a police officer. And then she brought to my attention. The fact that police office sometimes gets shot at sounds like no, I don’t do that. Just protect people’s feelings. I’ll just be this, like outages and go from there. And that’s really how it started. I made that statement at four and never looked back.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Wow, what a wonderful, your mom how amazing that she was able to think that for especially back then. I don’t know how old you are. But it’s got to be at least 20 something years. So back then people didn’t really do a lot of psychology. I didn’t think so that’s really forward thinking to get her daughter some help. That’s cool.

Unknown 5:50
Yeah, I’m very appreciative of her. She made sure that she wanted to make sure that I didn’t have some of the same issues that he she had growing up, especially in the black immunity. It’s it’s not uncommon for people to say you know, you don’t air your dirty laundry, if something’s wrong. And if something’s wrong with anybody in our family, we’re just going to talk about it amongst ourselves, and maybe it’ll go away. And my mother having that happened to her. It was like, no, we’re not going to do this again. We’re going to break this cycle. And she has been my cheering voice Ever since then, for getting me the help that I needed and also helping me stay the course to be the doctor that I want to be today. It’s all because my mama. Wow.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Thanks, Mom. Hey, Mom, where did you go to school?

Unknown 6:36
I’m born and raised in Washington DC. Okay, so I’ve had public school and tartar school and I guess you could say magnet school education here. And then I went to undergrad in Virginia Commonwealth University is in Richmond, Virginia. Go Rams go.

Unknown 6:56
And then I came back home and I got my masters and my doctorate at the American School of Professional Psychology.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Wow. DC. So you eat you grew up and just that high? High Intensity lifestyle?

Unknown 7:10
Yes. Nothing like it. It’s it’s a truly even going to Virginia, which is not far Central Virginia is two hours away from my own. But the pace was so slow as I could never live here. people screaming in traffic for me.

Unknown 7:27
crudeness, there’s not a long enough line at Starbucks. For me, I need more people

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
were thrown. I supposed to check your feet if you don’t have time. And Starbucks, right? Right. Oh, my goodness. So what have you decided? Because I’ve known people I’ve interviewed other people who becomes you know, doctors of psychology, there’s so much training, there’s so many ways that you can go, What is it? What did you end up specializing in?

Unknown 7:55
I didn’t. My track is clinical psych. And my specials. My specialty is I call urban trauma. Urban trauma deals with the chronic cycles of violence, poverty. And just other things that affect overlooked in poverty stricken communities. There’s a lot of I’m from from Washington, DC, but it’s not all president in the capital and monuments. There. They’re not so great neighborhoods everywhere in the world. And there are a lot in DC. So I decided that a lot of my focus was going to be with adolescents and adults who deal with those urban traumas. I also have my other specialty is chronic or severe mental illness. So that’s when we get into like personality disorders. Very chronic depression, schizophrenia is I am the schizophrenia whisperer. Haha. That’s one of my favorite populations to work with. So it’s kind of a catch all that I do see children, but I prefer adolescence, because it’s such a molding, a period of development. And plus, teenagers are hilarious. So

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC

Unknown 9:13
chose teenagers and older people. They’re hilarious.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
I heard I heard from a youth pastor one time he goes, you know, junior high, all the kids just they want you to like them, it’s like, and then once they hit puberty, high school is like, you’re not cool anymore. How can everybody like me, but they have that dynamic switches. But

Unknown 9:34
it’s funny to see, I love it.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
schizophrenia, though, how to that seems like a population from what I’ve heard is they can be very well managed, if they stay on the drugs, you know, the medications, but if they don’t, that’s when they end up in this state system, because they were walking around drunk or naked, or just kind of doing something that they they’re going to get arrested for, they find out they’re a little off and they get shipped off. And then they’re in a institution for three months or six weeks, once at a time and the king get out what what do you think that

Unknown 10:03
growing up, I grew up in the 90s and early 2000, DC, that was a lot of my childhood. So what you’re what you’re describing is a lot of what we saw the majority of the homeless population where those with severe mental illness, or homeless veterans. And sometimes you have that catch all you have the homeless veteran that had PTSD and or schizophrenia. And I actually got into it, because of everybody else’s apprehension with treating it.

Unknown 10:36
I realized that it can be challenging, but the challenge has this magical result, if you hit the mark, right where it needs to be. And I got thrown into it by the first therapy case I was assigned when I was at x turn was one of my supervisors, patients who was paranoid schizophrenia. And she was going and she’s also an army says a sergeant. So she’s like, I’m going on a mission. I’m going to give you my case, little she just kept laughing. I didn’t know what the hell she was laughing at. And mind you, I’m like three months and doing therapy, still a student. And she’s like, Oh, yeah, here’s the file. I’m assigning ran, so you can meet her. And she kicks in my door. She throws a bunch of stuff around, and she starts going on a rant about how the government had tapped every single phone. She made a bulletproof vest out of magazines and newspapers, flipped over my desk, destroyed the whole place. It was just yelling. And I’m sitting in a chair. And I looked at her and I was like, Are you done? And she said, Yes. And she started crying and cleaning up the room. And then I didn’t know then, but my supervisors were on the other side of the door, waiting to see what happened. And they were like, you’re gonna be fine. And

Unknown 11:58
already, I passed the first test. And I just was like, Oh, this is cool, because you never know what you’re going to get when a person is an active psychosis, and it can go wrong.

Unknown 12:11
Yeah, people don’t put the effort, a lot of clinicians kind of push it off, like, Oh, I’m just getting hospitalized. Everybody was getting any other different levels difficult in and out of episodes. I know people who have managed their, their own successfully with the help of psychotherapy and drug, I don’t believe in just giving one. I feel like if you’re going to do the medication, you definitely need to have that therapy to manage it. Because pills don’t get rid of all your problems. They just help with some of the symptoms. And I’m weird. So all the things that are weird, and challenging and nerdy and give me more information about cool stuff I follow. Oh, yeah,

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
it sounds like it’s one of those, even if they really don’t like it and don’t want to be that way. It’s not like you just take an antidepressant you get out of it, and you can function, this is actually a mental issue. That’s not come again, way. So you know, there’s only so much I don’t know what to say there’s only so much counseling, but if they’re aware of what’s going on, they can find ways to help manage it, as well as here’s a pill so that it does kind of make it a little bit easier as well.

Unknown 13:13
It depends on this symptom severity. So if you have a Okay, so there’s different types of schizophrenia and a DSM five there, we call it, we put the schizophrenia spectrum there different discuss the clinic disorders. So, if you can have a paranoid schizophrenic, that’s usually what you’ve seen in movies, outlandish one that hasn’t really outlandish delusions, and will tell you that books are on the wall, and I’m putting aluminum hat on because they’re going to get my thoughts. You have kind of catatonia, which is basically a comatose state. They don’t speak, they don’t interact, it’s very eerie. And then you have different of patterns were in it kind of you have one psychotic episode, and then the rest of your life is chill. Oh. So it really depends on the person. And it really depends on the support game. schizophrenia is one of those disorders where if you do not have support, research shows this kid go badly for you, your prognosis will be negative. And also, schizophrenia has one of the higher rates for depression and suicidality, because of the heaviness of the symptoms they come. So it’s something that you have to you’d have to have you don’t put kid gloves on. But you really have to be committed to following this person’s treatment to the T. And not not throwing it away, not throwing the baby with the bath, because, oh, they need to be medicated. Oh, no, they don’t want to do this. It takes time, lots of time,

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
especially if you’re a counselor who like I really don’t like these cases, but it’s part of my job. So I just do what I needed. You know, maybe we’ll do that as well. I would

Unknown 14:56
guess. I’ve seen it. Yes, they do.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah. Well, and one more question about the the adolescence the issues that you see, like you said, with like urban urban issues and violence and poverty, are you finding that the the services that you provide really help them to get over it? Or to cope with it? Or how does it? What kind of outcomes do you look for?

Unknown 15:18
Well, I would hope so. Well, as a therapist, that one to one, a lot of what a parents and adults don’t understand is teenagers actually like structure and discipline. So you would think, oh, they’re out of control, they’re out of control, because their boundaries haven’t been firmly set. So they’re always setting the limits. Once you address that with the child wants to address that with the adolescent, the teenager, and it goes to we go into a story, what do you need with what are you looking for? What is this acting out? Be? Why Why are you doing this. And once you get into those boundaries, and you get into the those feelings, and you help them understand will, if you throw a true story, if you throw a brick extra mom’s boyfriend car, that’s that good. But if you told your mom, what in the conversation with, with her boyfriend made you mad to want to pick up on it,

Unknown 16:23
and check it at the car, you see how Michael differently for you. So you have those moments. And also a lot of kids it is think about yourself, your 16 year old self, the person that you will are least likely to take advice from is your mom or your dad, right? There was probably some adult in your life that you thought was the most amazing, coolest person in the world. And you could go to that person with your secrets with the things you were scared of with the things you were proud of. And you knew there was no judgment and they accepted you for you. That’s what I bring to the therapeutic experience with an adolescent, it’s their safe place.

Unknown 17:02
To someone who throws a break, do they realize like, maybe I shouldn’t do this, or they just so full of anger that they don’t even care? Or maybe there’s no, there’s no repercussions. So it doesn’t matter. I’ve seen both I’ve seen kids who are genuinely remorseful for some of the things that they’ve done. I’ve had kids, you know, break out into like hysterical sobbing because they know the weight of what they did. And they didn’t want it somebody to pay attention to them. And that was the only way. And of course I will I’ve also had kids who straight up for him to shoot people are hurt people, and you’re like, Well, you know, the repercussions, you know, the consequences now, like, Okay, so what I go to jail care, you know, but it gets like that, yeah, care.

Unknown 17:50
Because there’s this was certain children I’ve seen, especially in the last couple of years, when I’ve been working in different schools and lending myself to different agencies, more of nothing’s going to change any way for me, my life is out of my control my circumstance, or out of my control, I could choose to change my behavior, but the people around me aren’t going to change. So why the house back here?

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Wow. Now is that how, how do you get

Unknown 18:15
out of that? That it’s hard. It’s all about chipping away at trust, once you develop a line of trust with them. And you prove to them that you know, what you say to me or or anything you say to me, I’m not going to try to use it against you like an adult, like a principal, like a teacher, you know, in let’s think about your actions. And because some kids don’t, they just don’t think that for some kids. And it’s like, I just I was mad because of the brick and not through it. And then you have some kids who I was mad because of this. And I picked up the brick because I’ve been through it because I know that he will be mad. And now we’re back together. You know? Yeah, there’s no, okay. Every teenagers have that that point. But teenagers who are struggling with their emotional wellness, may have those points where it’s really cloudy. And it’s I’m just trying to make myself feel better. I’m trying to feel something.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah. Wow, that is that is a true story. And if you don’t have a lot of family support or role models, the definitely would make it hard to see that I can move on do better I can get out of this situation.

Unknown 19:27
Absolutely. Absolutely. Okay.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Do you work in a like, you know, I’d say where you work or anything? Is it? Is it a private clinic? Or is it like a big organization that covers a lot of DC?

Unknown 19:37
I work I have? Well, there’s two things. I work as an educational advocate for a law firm. And that covers they work exclusively with education cases in DC. I provide assistance to the lawyers and my clinical experience and pinion when examining cases. So that’s that. And then by myself, I have my own company, which is live innovations consulting, LLC. That’s what Dr. Vivek comes from. And I do a lot of community activism. I do social skills groups, I do wellness groups, I do motivational speaking, and I do contract work for other agencies I come on as a mental health consultant, and I can help you with your summer program. I can help you with your training, I do seminars, so I wanted to do something where no matter what I was able to reach as many people as possible.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
I like that you got the one on ones. But then you have the global will say global but global in the sense of not just one on one all the time, and I treated 30 people this week, and that’s all I’m going to touch right you actually have an out a bigger outreach, a bigger touch on society with with the motivational speaking and all the other things you just mentioned. That’s pretty cool. Thank you, you don’t see a lot. Well, I guess I’m don’t see a lot of people wanting to do that as a, as a as a job where it’s always like a different kind of game, it seems like behind the scenes of like, why am I actually trying to be on a platform. And it’s not normally to help as many people as I can. And I’m just just that’s the way I make more money, I have to see a lot of people to make more money. But for you, it’s more like the more educate somebody, the more likely out can actually affect an entire population of people.

Unknown 21:23
Exactly. I always tell people, I went to my what I do is passion. So it doesn’t feel like work to me. And I can always I am my mother’s daughter, I know a million ways to make a check. But so that doesn’t faze me. I have literally at one point when I was doing cuz I was doing therapeutic work for agency, I didn’t get paid for eight months straight. And everybody else was like, you need to quit your job. And like I quit my job. There are people who won’t be served first year and a half I have I started my business, I charged no one for anything. I just wanted to go out and do my rounds in the community and talk to them and show them that I’m here. I wave consultation fees. And even the last week I gave away like seven free sessions. And then I counted my sessions by about 85%. So yeah, it was not about the money to me, because money comes in goes sanity. I want that to be stable. I rather chase vanity and chase people’s healing and recovery than chase a book.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah, it sounds to me like you’re doing the hard work now. And eventually it’ll get to the point where you are able to you know that you can actually charge what you’re looking for. Because you become the expert, you’ve become know we’ve got to have Dr. vivid, that’s who we have to have for this talk. And at that point, like Well, alright, we’re getting this was discussed. What are some of the most common misconceptions Not really, necessarily in psychology, but with the subset that you work with? What are some of the common mistakes conceptions that you you here,

Unknown 23:00
number one that everyone who comes with therapy is medicated.

Unknown 23:07
We lie I tell people all the time, I have people who are upset because their boyfriend, like some girls picture on Instagram. And then I have people who been hearing voices for 13 years. There, everybody’s not going to get Medicaid and everybody’s not going to get the same route for therapy. That’s always the first question. And then the second follow up is can you prescribe medication, a lot of people miss mistake psychologist with psychiatry, and I was actually prescribed medications. But we as I colleges, we treat, we identify, we diagnose. And we provide that consulting fee. So sometimes people will say why so my psychologist The only talk to me 15 minutes and sent me home that what he was supposed to. Yeah, you want to talk, you need to see your psychologist or therapist. Even there’s some licensed social workers that you can speak to. But that’s the that’s one of the biggest one the drugs.

Unknown 24:12
Also that I’m going to make you lay on the couch. Know?

Unknown 24:17
Where’s your couch? therapy, I’ve had therapy with people, I’ve walked around parks, talking to them. And that’s crazy. Well, that’s the only way they would talk if they were walking. I’ve had situations where I’ve laid on the floor and we look at the ceiling. And imagine how the clouds will feel that we told the clouds our feelings with little girls, you know, I you know, it’s about meeting you where you are. Yes. And I don’t think that I think that we kind of get a misconstrued and a bad rap from media. The way he shows it. You know, movies portray, the therapist is like how do you feel today? What else?

Unknown 25:02
how fat and talk about your feel? And it’s not what it is? With me it’s more realistic conversation like I talked to I’m talking to you and your listeners now is mostly the same when you see me in therapy because the human connection, right, everybody else boring? No.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah, it Do people always want an answer. Just tell me what to do. Here’s my problem. Just Just give me the answer, please.

Unknown 25:27
Yes, that’s true. Not even I’m not even gonna lie and say that’s not from my clients, to my family, to my friends. It’s always What should I do? And one of the things that also misconceptions counselor, you go to counselors for advice, right? Think about the guidance counselor, you’re at the academic counselor, they’re hoping you get that advice and giving you suggestions. What I’m doing as a clinician is helping you craft a tool, so you can actually solve the problem that I’m here to help you. You know, I’m sharpening your iron, you know, so you can have these tools ready. I don’t, there are very few situations where you actually say, this is what you need to do. And those situations are using when we’re talking about you can do if you’re thinking about doing something harmful to yourself, or it’s something that it’s legitimately a red flag, then I’m like, then I have to kind of put my foot down because I’m responsible for your safety, right? No, that’s not how it works. I’m not going to tell you I’m not a fortune teller. I’m not a mind reader.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Was your bad in a hurry, huh?

said to do this, and it would really bad.

Unknown 26:41
Exactly. Actually, that is one of the reasons. That therapist and also past pastors actually talking about this with the pastor, my pastors and therapists is the same thing. If I say you should do this, and you go out and do it, and it does not work in your favor. I’m gonna lose my license, probably, or I’m gonna have, you know, some type of complaint filed against me. And also, the thing about it was about giving advice to that extent is, mostly we’re thinking what we would do in that situation. We don’t have the same resources I as I have. You don’t have the same life and the same responses to things that I have. So I can’t tell you, you should. I can help you figure out what you should do. Yeah, we’re talking about let’s play this out to the inventory. Let’s see what what forks in the road? Can we force the and see how this might play out? Precisely? That’s exactly what it is. I don’t I always say be wary of people who just want to give you unsolicited advice all the time.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah. So what kind of unique abilities mindsets or strategies do you have that set you apart from your competition?

Unknown 27:51
Doing now we’re getting into the good stuff?

Unknown 27:55
Well, one, I am blessed that people tell me nice things about my me. So apparently, I have this uncanny ability to connect with people on a human level very quick. I’m really good at connecting in developing a rapport based on just feeling the person’s vibe in the room. Because that’s a lost art. So that but also I am not your traditional therapist. And the way I think there are different theories. And there are different trains of thought when you’re practicing. And some people like to go the whole Floyd route when its cycle analytic and are getting into your deep desires, and your mom and your dad and what happened. And then we have a cognitive behavioral therapists who are all about your thoughts and how they influence your behaviors. And then yours me, I’m a humanistic existentialist, which is a fancy word, or I believe in the power of the human experience, I don’t see you as a problem, I’m seeing you, as a person, that function is fun, and has some problems, the things that you do do not make you inherently bad or good. And also, there’s a sense of unconditional positive regard with me. If you do something that I don’t like, I’m able to, you know, separate the behavior from the person and say, if you let’s say, Dr. Justin curses me out on this podcast, which you hope you won’t. And then, and then two minutes later, you call me back and say, Can we finish the interview? I’m going to say, Yeah, okay, and you, what, you just cracks me up, I separated the behavior from the person, whatever was going on, then we can discuss that, but I’m not gonna hold that against you. It’s, it’s very, it’s a very fine line to tight rope. Because sometimes, you know, people are so used to

Unknown 29:54
doing things that get a response out of people you get some clients are like, why would you Why aren’t you man, I wound up therefore, if there if I’m mad, I’m just as you know, unproductive as the people around you who are helping you, you know, so there’s that. And also, I do weird things. So

Unknown 30:12
they call me the hippie therapists, Emma Olga, which is funny. So I’m all about feelings and vibe. So if we, for some mascara for Nick patients aren’t, is a big thing gets in front of patients who is this love of art, especially visual art. So I will paint with my parents, my patients, like I said, I’ve done like body scans, where I’m one of the kids lay on the floor and trace their body. And we talked about all the places that they felt their hurt, I like to do bring in a lot of different interventions, something I’ve created on my own, I use music, I use dance I use are more reflective person. So whatever language you use in the session is the language I’m going to give you. It really just in tune to other people’s that it’s cliche to say, I’ve been so into their emotion, but that’s the person I am, I want them to shape their experience. And it’d be a genuine experience in can’t do that in a traditional talk therapy setting, it got to add some spice to it, or you want to lose that relationship.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
That’s what I was gonna say it sounds like you’re actually taking your job seriously. And then at the same time, you’re like, if I’m trying to get the best results, I have to change sitting across from me in a desk and a chair, need a knee is not going to be the case for a lot of these people, we have to get an inventive and get creative, because in the end, that’s what’s going to get them to open up. And then like you said, trace out your feet, you know, trace out the places that you’ve heard for a kid that makes, you know, maybe for an adult as well. But to me that that makes sense, because you don’t know how to process and they don’t even know what they’re feeling. They just feel like maybe their their stomachs and knots are, you know, oh,

Unknown 31:56
then you can explore it, right? You’re on the money. If you’re right there. know a lot of people, especially dealing with diverse community at being a of African American therapist, understanding their different cultural biases. When it comes to therapy, like you said, with the 45 year old woman whose mom told her to pray about it, but her problems are still there, she doesn’t want to sit across the desk from you and just talk for 45 minutes. You know, and and that’s where a lot of the diversity gets lost, you have to really meet your your client where they are, and be willing to understand that this journey, they don’t want a journey like everybody else’s, they want something that is unique. And something that actually is effective, in order to be effective, you have to know your client, and you have to understand that you can read all the books in the world you get in that session for the first time, it’s not going to go textbook, you that you have to have an open mind, I find that people tend to get burnt out earlier along, when they don’t know how to flex their creative muscle. And,

Unknown 33:07
and that’s it’s problematic for clinicians, because once you’re burnt out, you really aren’t giving your best so you can be missing things. Or you can you kind of like can muddy the rapport because you’re just tapped out. And that’s how they feel they’re coming to you because they’re tapped out we can’t be tapped out together. So I always try to find things to make it so I’m always learning, I’m always doing something new. And I’m always trying to reinvent do something innovative and creative lead,

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
you know, if you’re not willing to break out of what you’re doing, you’re not gonna see the results. You know what? These people don’t respond to me and you just get frustrated? And do you find that, you know, a black woman, different culture than my white man growing? You know, growing up? There’s different cultural variances and things? Have you found that that is been helpful in connecting with your clientele. As it changed it? I mean, would you say it’s changed anything or helps you connect in any way or not?

Unknown 34:08
they experience most of my clients, when I first started doing therapy, most of my clients were African American. And in a training program, and school, I’m just going to be completely honest with you. There weren’t a lot of African American, there weren’t a lot of a lot of Latino classmates, there weren’t a lot of Asian classmates. So, you know, depending on what population you want it to get, you had to really be prepared to really be prepared to either be put in a place where you’re only going to get one type of demographic, or you’re going to get what you’re going to get what you want, you think you want and be bored out of your mind with me. And also, I always been aware of the fact that I look younger than I am. So that that was a curse and a blessing. Because it’s this little girl who sit across from you, and she wants you to talk but she she sounds like you, you know, being able to find that experience in the room. I remember when I first started, I has really good friend he is Caucasian male. He’s hilarious. He’s another clinician. And this woman came in and she saying who am I supposed to see him? And she looked at me for like this black girls nod of approval. I’m like, He’s good. He’s good. But all

Unknown 35:30
you think your work you got spent, you know, but it also frees them of a little bit of that intimidation in it. And that fear that comes with walking into a stranger’s office. It’s you look like me, you understand? Even though we didn’t live the same life, I have some knowledge of what it’s like for your experience. And then some cases, being a black therapists. It can also be daunting as you’re the token person and the grad school program, which I ran into. Yeah, you run into the it’s funny now but it wasn’t funny Bay, you run into the should if they’re playing rap music? Should I tell them to turn it off? You should? What what question is this? Like? or anytime there was anything diverse? They came up in the meeting? Like all the white faces, look at you go? How do you feel about that?

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yes. Can you chime in please? My It is like,

Unknown 36:31
no. But you know, it’s something again, my mom, I still cry about every I was crying about every three weeks and grad school. First of all, it’s difficult. And like I was under represented, people didn’t, there were some people who just did not like our presence. And the program that they were in, is it was a lot of like, micro aggressions and like prejudice comments made, and it can get to you. But at the same time, also, you know, adding more to my experience, as you know, a black woman who’s trying to heal other people, no matter what color you are, I can tell you the one time someone’s like when the last time you’ve been called, you know the N word. And I was like about two weeks ago and class.

Unknown 37:21
And you know, it, you can get to those issues. And even with people of other cultures, when you display your personal color is just kind of like this sigh of relief like you get me Yeah. Even if it’s not true, because there are some people who are so disconnected from their own diverse, their own diversity issues, their own culture, they don’t that doesn’t make a connection. But when you do connect is powerful. And you kind of got that. Like I said, they’re not of approval, like Okay, fine. She won’t do me wrong, right? You understand? Yeah, hope I’m making sense you

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
aren’t? Well, it’s true. It’s kind of a weird thing for me to say, but you know, I live in China, everybody’s Chinese, like, I’m the only not Chinese person in an entire city of about 200,000 people. So anyways, I go, especially if you start going off to like a smaller store, everybody just kind of looking at you like, oh, what’s the white guy doing here? That’s I’ve never seen one of those before, literally never seen one in person before. And if you see another white person, I’m like, oh, I’ve already walked across the street like, Hey, what’s going on? What are you doing here? You want to get coffee? It’s not familiar face. I don’t even know what you’re here. But please, let’s have a conversation

Unknown 38:28
in forever.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
So I actually feel like I can understand a little bit of it. Whereas before coming here, that’s a it’s not something I would have been able to say I think, what type of advice could you possibly have for college kids who maybe you’re thinking about doing what you’re doing, and then potentially graduates who are about to finish and aren’t really sure what to do now?

Unknown 38:50
One of the as well to make a joke, and I was like, nope, no, do that. One of the, for college students, I would definitely say it’s so cliche, but time management and not in the way that most people think you know, we go to cause people say time management in to find time to study time, find time for yourself, time management, in terms of taking time to find out who you are. And if this is really what you want to do.

Unknown 39:18
It is not a profession where you just take your lab coat off, I’m just I’m just using this I’m not right. So I need to take a lab coat off. It’s put your hat on a rack and you can be whoever you want to be after that there’s such a disconnect is a very heavy emotional connection, what you’re doing, and you really take some self introspection to Am I ready to handle the week of other people’s issues on a regular basis. Also will tell them I did have a VCU externship so I had the responsibility. I had that excuse me, I had the opportunity to work with the neuro psychologists and social workers a free clinic. So I would say if you can get any type of volunteer hours or extra shifts for free, yes, for free, go and do that. So you can understand what you’re about to get into, before you petition or go to grad school and you get into it, you’re like, Oh, this is not, this is not for me.

Unknown 40:20
And then it goes hand in hand with the grad student is a long room is not for the weak at heart. You know, there’s a lot of things that you have to handle before you can, you know, get that piece of paper in your hand. And I want to self care, self care. So real. And grad school, I roam around myself ragged.

Unknown 40:41
And you know, lots of lots of wine, bottle crying, lots of studying, and then drinking more whining, crying, you know, it’s just, it’s funny. But you forget how to take care of yourself before you start being hard on yourself, I have to prepare for this after prepare for that after prepare for this. So you’re going without sleeping, you’re eating crap that you shouldn’t be eating. And if there were a couple times where I just know if I would have taken time out of my schedule to just say, take a nap. Be nice to yourself, Ashley, take a shower. If you take a shower now, eat something, take a 30 minute nap the world won’t catch on fire.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Under the grind,

Unknown 41:22
it is hard. But there were a couple times I had to like do do that. And once I started working on my, the last my dissertation, I had to have like one called come to Jesus moment and I was like new, you take a break right now. Because if I don’t, I’m going to explode. And something I also would like to say to any women or men for that, so I want to exclude when I finished my program, I was pregnant with my daughter, very pregnant. I had my child right before I was going to go to my last externship with my internship. And they pose the question to me and administrative offices. Which one do you want to be? Do you want to be an efficient, efficient clinician or efficient mom. And I remember thinking to myself, I have to choose, oh,

Unknown 42:17
that really hurt me it was a lot of all you’re pregnant people are going to give you a chance or less one less than one more thing they have to worry about. You would you’re gonna have make time for your work and your family. And I felt so overwhelmed. And I felt terrible. I went back to school six days after I had my child, I allowed to have maternity leave. And I remember feeling so low when discussing with others what I was doing, like I had to choose and now looking back on it. I got my internship, they told me I wasn’t gonna get I have a great doctor. I haven’t broken her yet, or years and and she’s still not broken. Yes. And it’s such a rewarding feeling. Say I did it. Because I knew I could, instead of letting people talk me out of my dream, don’t let you out of your dream.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
That’s crap that somebody would would say that like in this, especially in this day and age where you can there’s so much support, if you can, if you wanted to do both. I mean, that’s Wow. But if you’re in academia, sometime that’s what they want. They want the person who is going to publish and maybe do research and they know the time constraints. And they’re like, well, we don’t really we’re not going to put you on the tenure track. Because we know your family’s more important and working 16 hours a day. So do you have to market at all?

Unknown 43:38
do you market at all, like marketing? I do a lot of social media marketing, I do a lot of events in the area. I keep they’re getting you’re in China, or do events not in your area would have right?

Unknown 43:52
Yeah, so I’ve been I’ve been doing it that way. When you’re a one man or one woman band, you know, you try to find as many ways to market as possible. And I do a lot of freedom. It’s as a marketing strategy to so people can say if you’re getting this for free, what could you be getting when you’re actually paying for it? So not that I’m downplaying anything on those on those free sessions. But I just want you to see this is a glimpse of what you can get. So do that. And my mom yells at me a lot for this county.

Unknown 44:29
Okay, yeah, then let

Unknown 44:32
for free, so many painful free.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
you’ve ever I think in counseling, psychology, there’s a it’s a tough, tough niche sometimes, because you’re trying to get people who may not believe in what you do or know what you do. Why don’t you try me once? You know, once you try me, then you may find that it actually works. But you know, I don’t know what you charge. But sometimes it can be pretty high or enough to where you’re like, ooh, I gotta find the money to do this, and then have the value in it. The ones you started then you’re like, Okay, there’s a lot of value here. Okay, I’ve got to make this a priority for the next couple of months. You understand? Yeah, yeah. I’m a chiropractor. We

understand these these. These hurdles. Sometimes.

Unknown 45:17
I need a chiropractor. How dare you be in China?

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
I wouldn’t live in Washington DC. No way.

Unknown 45:25

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
It is actually you know what it is? I’m the opposite, though. That much traffic without great public transportation would just make me go bananas though.

We went for a wedding. And I think we were up about two and a half hours north. It took so long as like it’s only 10 miles. Still in traffic.

Unknown 45:48
It took me 25 minutes to drive two blocks from my apartment. To the light that I need to turn who to get toward it tend to sometimes Yeah, a 15 minute ride can turn it so 45 minutes in the traffic I’m not gonna lie to you

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
know, like somebody needs a bicycle.

Unknown 46:09
We have a lot of programs here though. There’s like a things here. Now they’re like different color bikes littered around the city. Some of them you paid for like a time and some of them you pay like $1 per 30 minutes to write it is put the bike down the kickstands. Now, you want to ride the bat, you want to ride the bike, you open the app, you scan the QR code.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
On another day that you’re all over the place. In the bigger cities, there rife with struggles as if you’re the owner of those things. But as for you and me it is amazing.

Unknown 46:40
It’s awesome. I like it a lot.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Where do you see your field going? In the next five years, uh, y’all trying to get prescription rights.

Unknown 46:48
There are some on that I think Arizona, maybe Florida, there are two states all want to miss miss speak. But there are two or three states in the US that have a track that psychologists can actually push by medication. We’re not really trying to push more towards that. The post that I see is integrative healthcare, and also therapy via technology using technology like kind of we’re doing now like Skype sessions, a lot of

Unknown 47:24
their pros and cons of though there are some people who use them like I do my wellness sessions that way. But I prefer that intimacy of having a person in front of you. Because they’re a little micro aggressions, they’re a little my new things that happen with your body and gestures that you can’t really pick up over a phone. And you can see over Skype. But you know, it’s something about feeling that that that power in the room when you hit a breakthrough, boy, you have like serious emotional moment. And I can see it on your face if I’m with you on Skype. But I always offer cyber, a wellness connections. Second, to meeting you in and below. I don’t know I have no problem with it. I think it’s actually pretty genius, right? At least for maintenance patience. Okay, that’s the thing, you hit it on senior, you’re so knowledgeable without even asking like you’re knowledgeable, is great for maintenance. But if you have chronic illness, that’s not something I will want you to utilize. And unfortunately, but how America setup as far as money, money, money, money, you know, that’s is that might be appealing to somebody who doesn’t want everybody to know that they go to a therapist, accident and you can’t see below my shoulders.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
You don’t know what I’m doing with my hand. I could be not wearing pants and you wouldn’t even know.

Unknown 48:46
And that would be weird. And they will be weird. But no, it wasn’t because I mean, you’re in here and I’m here, right?

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Body language, like I talk with my hands. And I’m talking with my hands. It’s just happens to be right below the camera where you actually can’t see me fidgeting with my opinion or doing whatever I’m doing. So I could see that being a little bit of trouble. If you’re trying to, you know, talk to somebody like, Hey, you were really fidgety? What was going on? Why are you so uncomfortable?

Unknown 49:14
Exactly. I can’t catch those nuances from the other side of the screen. Yeah. And also when it comes to, like I said, there are pros and cons to it. But when it comes to let’s say, if you had an incident where there was power, whether it be so palmed intend to harm someone else, like I don’t I’m not, I can’t get to the winter.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah, I’m not going to show you my bruise unless you, you know, again, he’s not going to casually show show you that

Unknown 49:41
way and you’re not in my office, let’s say you’re having a depressive episode. It’s really bad. And you’re thinking about harming yourself and not physically in my office, I can’t do what I would normally do and say, hey, you’re going to stay here, we’re not going to move until we until we figure it out. You can just clip it to the the cut the computer off and go about your business. Yeah, do know that what they have now is the ability for you to connect to hospitals and mobile crisis units in the area. So that was to happen. And that’s something I always tell people to make sure. But if you know I’m not I’m not knocking it out as want it to be a little better regulate it

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
sounds like there’s a place for it. Mm hmm. So we’re going to switch gears you ready for the more personal side of this? And we’ll wrap up? Oh, sure. Most of us have a daunting schedule sounds like you’ll be the same same boat. How do you take vacation? And is there a way to take more,

Unknown 50:36
I’m not gonna lie to you. I have not been on a vacation since August 2012 is Brian as a problem, but I’m, but I’m a big advocate myself can one because I was paying for grad school I was poor. So

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
vacations just

Unknown 50:50
often work. That’s what I was going to. So what I’ve been doing is taking little moments in time for myself. But like all my birthday, My birthday is in December. So I’ll book a hotel room for just myself and go a food that I want to eat without having a kid asked me Can they have some so nice to do that. Or every twice a month, I would do things like go get my my full Manny Patty and just go drive out to so I go back to Virginia. Richmond, Virginia is nowhere for DC know. So I want people to think that it’s far, but I go to Richmond allows two hours away, I do like drive. So Ohio Plaza, North Carolina drives a Jersey, New York, just you have to do something for yourself does not connected to other people, or you do become overly dependent on the presence of other people. I’m not 38 I’ll be 30 at the end of this year. And one of the things on my 30 before 30 was to take a vacation by myself without fear. You know, whether it’s a day, or whether it’s a couple of days. I think self self care, self love and self awareness is something that I always promote with our videos. It means it’s such a heavy thing to discuss because we put ourselves last so often, and especially in the profession that I’m in, you’re carrying the weight of all your clients and all their issues and all your personal issues. You have to find a way to back up or you’re going to burn out or you’re going to start hating what you do. And I never want to wake up at eight but I do

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
know never I mean you’ve only been doing it for a few years if you’re not even 30 your

Unknown 52:34
career heady as I started young. Sorry. I started my program when I was 21 So are you hit the

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
ground running just non stop

Unknown 52:42
mass that so you have the same people since I was 21? Oh,

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
well third is not that big of a deal. I mean, it’s a big deal. If you want it to be then it we just I just made it a nice experience was fun celebrating it and

Unknown 52:57
I always want to have fun and dance and drink and eat ice cream.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Ice cream. What’s your flavor and what you’re going through flavor? I’m curious.

Unknown 53:06
I have a friend who was a chef. He owns Ruby scoops ice cream. She makes this amazing like peach cobbler ice cream. She also makes and she’s trying to duplicate for me. What I would say yes. Baileys Irish cream Haagen DOS, if you’re listening, I don’t know why you did out away with that flavor. That flavor. Saved My Life in college.

Unknown 53:37
It’s so hard to buy. So yeah, anything Ruby scoops and Holland DOS, I Baileys Irish cream. You know about bluebells blueberry cobbler ice cream. bluebell has nothing on Ruby screwed All right. All right.

Unknown 53:55
bluebell is tap water

Unknown 53:59
is sparkling felt.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
This is custom made versus commercial. listeria.

Remember that a couple years ago people were like I don’t know if they died. Oh, they didn’t die. I just got sick.

Unknown 54:14
Sick. But the thing about Americans and I can say this word dumb will be told you know you shouldn’t eat this because the recalling it for this. It will still eat it anyway.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
That was that was the other batch.

Unknown 54:26
This one’s good. It’s not this one. That was way before that. No, it’s not you’re going to die. Don’t eat that. That was an

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Alabama? Surely they just said the bad stuff there.

Unknown 54:36
One cow. It was one cow.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah. Yeah, there’s mixed in a million gallons of other cows milk people.

Do you have any volunteering or hobbies are anything else that creates that work life balance on a regular basis?

Unknown 54:52
Yes, yes is my one of my best friends is such a bathroom that our families acknowledges his brother and sister. He is a he’s a athletic trainer and coach and conditioning coach for basketball. He trains high school students go to school students, college students, people that are balling overseas. This summer, we work together and we did the clinic, which was we call it the for the summer. So he handled the basketball piece as far as the training and conditioning and all that and I handled the social emotional piece. So it was helping them understand who they are as a player and who they are as outside of themselves as a player. Because a lot of them have everybody know that for playing basketball. But they know that I’m actually going one of my kids was like, No one knows I’m going to Stanford for eight days to do this program, because I’m going to get early admission. Nobody knows that I want to be a biochemical engineer. And all they see throwing, you know, shoot threes. And also we help them with you know, their sportsmanship and just believing in themselves and developing a solid identity. So that is one of the things I do I still go and work with him. When I’m free or what he needs me. He knows I do that. Also, I have a program called innovator Academy and vivid kids were innovator Academy is for 14 to 17 year old, or 13 to 17 year olds and then vindicate this from three to 12. And we work on different identity issues, emotional wellness, as we work on, you know, in a personal communication in different ways. And also like a lot of the kids that I had, I kind of adopted them as like little kid sisters or innovator Academy sisters, and we work on your own college tours. I literally went with one of my mentees to her school. I got her information for the school, I hope move and when she needs me, I go down there and help her move and give her the you know that reassurance she needs to keep taking because it can be hard and college. Yeah, um, you know, we do resume prep, we did mock interviews, of those things that all those things are completely free of charge. is just because a lot of people in the community don’t have access to

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
what am I guess said? Maybe 42% of the people graduate that star college?

Unknown 57:15
Yeah. Or, or they don’t graduate on time in their projected?

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Right. I was surprised. You know, because it depends. We run with this kind of like, well, the people I ran with, we all graduated you like that’s because of who you ran with. But the average person that’s like, Oh, yeah, those people forgot. The world has been in my social circle.

Any advice on spouses significant others, to keep that love alive and feel connected, so that you don’t end up in like divorce and all that,

Unknown 57:46
Oh, that’s a good one. And I can actually help you even further because I recently divorced. And one of the things that I stress to people is, you have to know yourself outside of a relationship, you really have to know what you’re looking for in life, you really need to know what goals you have to achieve your ideal life. Because when you don’t know who you are outside of relationship and get into a relationship, and you try to make things manifest, and you have people who don’t really know how to communicate their needs to one another, and it can become toxic, or it could just come monotonous because you haven’t taken that introspective time, you’re so focused on other people that you forgot to, you forgot to love yourself before you begin to try loving sculpt nails, and that that’s paramount. And also in relationships, you just have to take time, I recommend there be our recommended couples counseling, pre couples counseling and verify that it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you, it just means that you’re willing to talk to your spouse, your significant other on a deeper level and really understand what issues are, what baggage they’re coming in. And you know, they know what your issues is you’re bringing in not that it has to be this big negative thing. But there are a lot of things that, you know, without that, that therapists in the room may not get brought up. I think that’s really important. And, and the identity outside of yourself. I buy a Tesla, we still care. He’s a great co parent. And one of the things I always tell them, he says you’re right to hop. So right, you went on doors, he says, You’re right, I need to find time to do things outside of this. It’s okay to have a girls night in guys nights and man caves and all those things. Because you have to your and your whole existence can’t be on this person’s wife, and this person’s husband, and this mom on this bed. Because if that’s all you have, they’re going to be times when these things don’t look as well. They don’t look great from the outside looking at, somebody is going to be acting up. Somebody could get an argument you could just be filling. There are some times where every parent or everyone resume for like am I’m the worst person in the world. If you put so much weight on that title of this, although this is who I am, you really don’t give yourself a chance as yourself a chance to prosper and to grow. And then because you don’t know who you are, you can’t contribute to the support and get your spouse to be where they’re trying to be. The president wants to the car.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah, not to mention people change, whether on purpose or an accident happens or they just get enlightened on something. That’s why that you do like you said, you do need to have a counselor of some sort somebody to talk to a therapist, because you might change and you like I don’t really know if I like the person that this they’re becoming. Exactly. That’s a hard conversation to have at your in your living room.

Unknown 1:00:43
Or you get exposed to a person that I didn’t even know you had this side to you. Well, we never explored it. Yeah. We never explored it. A I think there’s unfortunately I’m seeing a lot of younger, the trend is people are getting married younger, but also the end the world quicker. Oh,

Unknown 1:01:02
yeah. Millennials are like there’s a lot of pressure on us to be successful in everything. Get your get your get your college education, get your job, it’s your career, get your get your child get your house, and it’s like this Easy Bake Oven of relationships

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC

I didn’t think the millennials really got married anymore. They’re just like,

Unknown 1:01:25

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
if we’ve been together for about 10 years, we’ll talk about it. But until then, just live together. And that’s it.

Unknown 1:01:35
Is it true my friend just got to see the celebrated her first wedding anniversary. They had been together 11 us and they finally got married. However, the people I mean, it works. I’m not saying don’t get married young. But I’m saying just be invested in finding yourself and exploring who your your significant other is, before you make that commitment. Yeah, because you want to make sure that you have which you need to persevere. And you can be the support that they need. So they can persevere as well. Otherwise, they’re both screwed. Because emotionally, you don’t know each other. You don’t know. You’re so in in especially when you’re moving in with somebody that’s a whole different ball. Okay. Yeah. Has your person 2470 you like I did not know, you just do a close on the hamper. without actually knocking them in? Oh,

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
exactly. No, I mean, I hear you. I was I was married young. And then it only lasted like six years. And then we tell you that wasn’t in the life plan. It was definitely, you know, so you gotta go through some soul searching and some counseling and some, some some conversations with yourself to figure out all right, let’s do this better. You know, there’s more than last questions, you’re ready. Ready? Do you have any kind of morning or lunch routine that grounds you are excited for the rest of the day?

Unknown 1:02:55
Yes. Every morning, when my daughter wakes up, we have a handshake. And I do affirmations with her every morning every night, and that drives me so I handshake is a half a pound. And then we whittle our fingertips and touch them on each other. And that’s, that’s that every day, I look in the morning and my marriage, my bathroom. There are affirmations that I wrote for myself. And also quotes that I found for my sake for my favorite writers and philosophers. And I attached what I interpret that quote is, so every morning when I’m washing my face and brush my teeth on repeating these things to myself, and no matter what the day, no matter what’s going to go on, and that day, I’m equipped with these affirmations and I want to let that kind of set the tone

Unknown 1:03:51
and lunchtime while living you know, living in DC during the summer and the spring. I didn’t walk I go on a walk for lunch break. Have to I can’t I don’t recommend people sit in their offices all the time. I need to get Sunlight, sunlight, it does wonders for your mood, literally chemically, it enhances some of those. Those things that we need is chemicals in order to neurotransmitters. So I like to get as much vitamin D as I can. And also I mean have right rituals to I have to do certain things or in order for me to wake up and be prepared for the day and that that’s my daughter’s ritual to my tell my daughter that she she she knows that now I’m doing with her since she’s one. I’m smart, I’m tired. I’m beautiful, amazing, amazing, awesome. And loved. And she also goes by potential is limitless limitless. will sit here and your head and wants to hear your heart No one can take away madder and madder and madder and madder. She says her name she says how old she is. And she identifies the least five people who love her.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Oh my goodness.

Unknown 1:05:00
We do this every night. And to the point where if she sees me having a bad day, she looks at me and goes you’re smart. You’re kind you’re important like we we go through those. Those are the things that keep me and I have pictures of my daughter everywhere. Those are my starters like my job and my computer all my computer on my phone inside of my car. So whenever I feel like where am I going to get this fuel to keep going? I just look at her little goofy smile and I’m done. I’m good.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Yeah, while you’re setting this kid up to be highly emotionally satisfying.

Unknown 1:05:37
Hope so. My goodness.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Like intentional right intentionality?

Alright, so the last question. It’s fun, favorite books, blogs, podcasts, favorite phone apps things that you secretly live at things that everybody just needs to know about?

Unknown 1:05:55
Okay, favorite book meditations by my Marcus Aurelius don’t judge me.

Unknown 1:06:03
Mark is a real use of has some some of the quotes that he he has an end meditations I have them sprinkled all around my house a wrap. Okay, so Okay.

Unknown 1:06:16
My friends love the trailer and the musically app, because we challenge each other to like remake music videos and phones. And once that once you send them a video you have to you have to answer and your answer has to be 10 times better. So there’s a bunch of lip synching videos on me on instagram somewhere cuz that’s our guilty pleasure. Also, what am I obsessed with? Oh, I’m obsessed with game of Throne Room. Yes. Don’t do that. Don’t I love game before? Never seen it? Oh my god. I know all about it ish.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Kind of.

Good. I got

Unknown 1:06:58
my own shows. Yes, true. weird thing. I can’t. I can’t watch I love horror movies. I’m a big horror movie fan every day in October you watch a horror movie. However at night, I can do not watch horror movies in the dark by myself so much that I can’t watch certain things in the dark by myself. So every night by nine o’clock if I’m not watching some like award show or something other like whatever other show. It has to be on Cartoon Network on Adult Swim. I will not be able to go to sleep if Adult Swim is not playing in the background. I don’t know why.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
So Netflix, there’s a new Chucky movie like wow, they’re still putting out Chucky. If arable. Yeah, you know, it’s interesting. I was watching what is a Dangerous Minds or I don’t know one of those. One of those psychological thrillers where they always chasing like these insane criminals and criminal minds. That’s what it was criminal minds. I was way too many episodes. My dreams started getting crazy. So I was like, I need to knit back that off for a while.

Hello, slightly inappropriate humor. never heard anybody, right? Yes. Okay, so how can people get in contact with you if they want to know more information if you want to know more,

Unknown 1:08:13
my website is vivid innovators that calm, vivid, be the ID innovative I in a va te Rs. calm. That’s where you can browse the website, see some of the services I’ve done season the things I’ve done on Instagram and Dr. vivid and Facebook Live innovations consulting LLC. And also on Twitter. I’m at the innovators. So you can feel you can reach me anywhere. And you can attest that the bat, I respond to direct messages fairly quick.

Unknown 1:08:51
So if you want to if you have any questions and not even if as you’re looking for services, I even say if anybody’s had just a question about their mental health, there emotional well being shoot me, shoot me a tweet, and I’ll hook you up with resources. Or I can do chat with you for a while. Very good.

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Well, that has been an amazing hour. Dr. Ashley, I really appreciate your time. And I hope that people will definitely benefit those who listen to the podcast, and I think they will.

Unknown 1:09:19
I hope so. And I really am honored by you asking me to be a guest. I’m so appreciative of you. Let me come into your world for an hour. I really enjoy myself and the whole thing we can do something again together. Shin

Dr. Justin
Trosclair, DC
Dr. vivid you shared so much. I hope people will go back and listen to this one more time. Pull out what they can to better their life. Maybe use some counseling for themselves past stuff, new stuff, it never hurts. Definitely check her out on Instagram. She’s got some really great 32nd videos. And hey, reach out if you need a motivational speaker or someone to help you with some programs a doctor’s perspective. NET slash for for travel tip is coming up next.

Thank you for listening to the podcast, a doctor’s perspective. Thank you for writing reviews on wherever you listen to it. ranking is five stars. Hopefully, listen, you all know I got a book out I’ve been working on a version 2.0 right now if you buy it, send me an email with the receipt and I can send you five bonus chapters. It’ll just be this long PDF, but we’re gonna have some nerve stretches creating and executing a budget ways to cut expenses. Optimal calorie consumption calculator fit directly for you and some ideas about fasting. So if you want some of these bonus chapters before they released in version 2.0, just send me that receipt via email and I’ll get them over to you. As always, we got some t shirt designs for the logo for chiropractic. There’s also a by host a cup of coffee upgraded that it’s on the main web page. And lastly, stay tuned a secret project will be coming out definitely go to a doctor’s perspective. NET top right there are all the social media icons pick which one you love the follow most friendly like me say hello, I’ll definitely respond back.

This week’s travel tip if you didn’t know all of these websites you can go to on your phone. If you use a mobile phone, sometimes they will actually have better discounts then if you use the website, so check your mobile before you buy.

We just went hashtag behind the curtain and this episode has come to an end. I hope you got the right dose for your optimal life. Please spread the word about this podcast by telling to friends, share it on social media and visit the show notes on a doctor’s perspective. net to see all the references from today’s guests. sincere thank you in advance. You’ve been listening to Dr. Justin trust Claire giving you a doctor’s perspective.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

About the Author
Dr. Justin Trosclair, D.C., an expert in Chiropractic Care, has been focusing on back and neck pain relief for over 12 years and has delivered treatment to more than 6000 patients. With advanced training in treating disc derangement conditions, you can count on him to keep up to date with the latest research in physical medicine for spinal pain. He has 5 years of hospital experience in China, is currently working in Germany, and had a private practice in Colorado for 6 years. Dr. Trosclair hosts a doctor to doctor interview podcast called ‘A Doctor’s Perspective‘ with over 220 episodes. During his free time he wrote 3 books. Today’s Choices Tomorrow’s Health (rebooting health in 4 categories), a Do-It- Yourself acupressure book for 40 common conditions called Needle-less Acupuncture, and a step by step guide to look like a local for Chinese dinner culture called Chinese Business Dinner Culture. If you have kids, you may be interested in his 6 series tri-lingual animal coloring book series (english, spanish and chinese).